Books to Help You
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Grieving the Child I Never Knew"When the anticipation of your child’s birth turns into the grief of miscarriage, tubal pregnancy, stillbirth, or early infant death, no words on earth can ease your loss. But there is strength and encouragement in the wisdom of others who have been there and found that God’s comfort is real."
Each devotion includes:
From Jennifer: This book was the first one I read all the way through. Taking my time when I was alone, I could read one devotion a day or three, and cry when it was needed. I recommend this one the most. Very gentle with approaching different aspects and situations with love, this author has personal experience with our trials. From the deep depression of the soul, to the gut wrenching screams, even to the realization that most folks don't know what NOT to say; this book is for you. |
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Empty Cradle, Broken Heart"Deborah Davis, Ph.D., encourages grieving and makes suggestions for coping. Incisive comments from parents who have suffered through the death of a baby convincingly relay this message: "You are not alone and you can survive."
From Jennifer: This book is written in text-book style. If you want a reference book for what you are going through and coping, this is the one. |
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Love Letters to Miscarried Moms"The word "miscarriage," in today's culture, is a dirty word-rarely discussed and grossly misunderstood. Yet, one out of four pregnancies ends in this tragedy. Where are these women, Samantha wondered, after her miscarriage? Slowly, quietly, women began to approach her, but, "I've had a miscarriage too," was all they could offer. Samantha realized that she had unwittingly become a member in an underground, secret society of women who suffer alone in silence."
From Jennifer: I haven't read this one through. It's a very raw account of this mamma's experience. |
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A Guide For Fathers"This pocket sized book is for men who experience the death of their infant child -- whether it be miscarriage, stillbirth or early infant death. Meant to be a guide during the early hours and days after finding out the news of their baby's death, the book offers suggestions for communicating with medical caregivers, offering support to their partner, telling the news to other children, making funeral arrangements and taking care of themselves in a time of crisis. It goes on to talk about effective communications during the weeks and months following the loss, going to a support group, returning to the workplace, and the issues surrounding a subsequent pregnancy."
From Jennifer: I wasn't sure this was a good resource, but it's hard to find one for fathers. I had two guys flip through it, and both said it's good. To me, its a very cut and dry, straight to the point booklet. It really is small enough to fit in your back pocket. |
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I Will Carry You"In 2008, Angie Smith and her husband Todd (lead singer of the group Selah) learned through ultrasound that their fourth daughter had conditions making her “incompatible with life.” Advised to terminate the pregnancy, the Smiths chose instead to carry this child and allow room for a miracle. That miracle came the day they met Audrey Caroline and got the chance to love her for the precious two-and-a-half hours she lived on earth."
From Jennifer: I haven't read this book yet, although it looks like a great read for someone who is facing a similar situation and decisions. |
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Something Happened"This beautifully illustrated, simple, clear story is designed to help a young child understand what has happened when there has been a pregnancy loss. The book addresses the sadness that a child experiences when the anticipated baby has died. The child's fears and feelings of guilt are addressed as well as other confusing feelings. Perhaps most important, the book includes the family's experience of going on with life while always remembering their baby. The child reading the book is left with a sense of reassurance that life continues and he is still a vital part of a loving family. Most pages include a box with words for parents. These words are there to help parents understand what their child might be experiencing and why the particular illustrations and text were chosen."
From Jennifer: Written and illustrated for having the conversation with older children, this should help a lot. Although I did not need this for my family, this can help you as a parent help your child deal with the grief they are experiencing as well. Remember, there is no time table for grief. |
Articles that may Help
President Reagan stated, “When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a word to describe them.” |
Types of Remembrance
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The Seashore of Remembrance gives families the opportunity to honour a loved who has passed away in a unique and meaningful way. I inscribe names in the sand under sunsets and draw butterflies for babies, children and adults of any age or gestation that have passed away. |
